Integration

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Originally uploaded by amandajaynecarmichael

Being a integrated human being is something that I strive for as I can so easily be segment myself. I can be different for different people and different siutations. It is an old habit that I have been trying to loose but it so often revisits in a big way. I have many passions and I have a day job my art even splits into two different streams and so at the moment I feel too fragmented. I just want to be myself and not have separate parts of me hanging off the side (well that is how it feels).

Walking around on Saturday I saw the blossom tree and the road sign, I want to be a bit more like that even if it is showing my utiliatrian useful self next to sweeter blossoms. I know that the only one that can give me persmission to do this is myself and my own thinking and beliefs can be my greatest enemy.

I learnt abouot being myself when I went and studied counselling, I learnt to take risks to dress like a way that felt like me and make decisions from instinct. I did what made me happy and life unfolded in great ways. I feel a distant from that now, even though I do have moments where I am whole and myself it seems to easily slip and I yearn to be there again and to live with a level of personal freedom that comes with it.

new mini obsession

well the collaborative art project started it with our not so polished video and then ever since seeing a cut out animation on etsy i have a new mini obsession - animation!! Not the flashy animation of the movies but the obviously raw ones that have a lot of character.

Here is my one for today check it out - Post it Deadline

a lovely looking fashion video

Découvrez “ Le bel été ” avec Lou Doillon et Gonzales.
Discover the film “ Le bel été ” with Lou Doillon and Gonzales.
http://www.vanessabruno.com

actually doing it - the reality of the dream

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Originally uploaded by amandajaynecarmichael

well for a long, long, long time I have been talking about putting the Splendidly Imperfect Girl out into the world in different ways. So I have now officially stopped procrastinating and have started to make it happen. It is has been such a powerful and interesting process. My fear is huge, and so instead of feeling excited and happy (as I imagined I would in all the day dreaming and planning for the last 4 years) I have felt scared, sad and down right horrible. I have been reading Summer Pierre book 'An Artist in the Office' and that has really helped. It has opened me up to thinking that there is a reason I put my day job first, and that if I didn't have it and I was doing this fulltime imagine what I would be like. All these discoveries have been a reality check for me. There have been moments of pure excitment and then the gremlins of my thinking come out to play.

So the online shop is still in infancy but I will keep it secret not longer....
www.imperfectworld.etsy.com

The imperfect girl also has a diary...
www.imperfectworlddiary.blogspot.com

So far I have put up paintings for sale and t-shirts and mugs are next on the agenda.
xxx

oh no some video art

in class we have been working on a group collaboration, it has been secretive, and fantastic. I wouldn't have the courage to do this on my own. Part of the work was giving an envelope out in London like you would be promotional leaflets. The location was where the work was inspired from. We have recorded it, I find it entertaining others I don't know. But here is the link and much to my friends and the boy's horror some video art.

for a 6 min experience but you always have the control check it out on you tube

Are you wondering what is in the envelope.....

out of office: busy making dreams happen

my out of office for my blog is a focus on my dreams. It is not an easy ride and yesterday the pressure I have put on myself sent me over the edge into a childlike tantrum and disarray with it all not working perfectly. The craziness of it is that I am working on something that is about being imperfect but my own self was getting in the way. I find it incredibly hard when it is something that I want so much not to get attached and just enjoy the process. Fingers crossed next update will be about the first part of the dream coming true. xxx

photos from liverpool adventure

i went on a solo adventure to Liverpool and visited the Afro Modern exhibition at the Tate and walked around and took lots of photos. It was great to have an adventure again for no particular reason.

ok I ate pecan pie an some cake too!

Daring to follow my dreams

Before I discovered how to became SPLENDIDLY IMPERFECT,I worked jobs that paid for bills and lifestyle and my life look fine and often to others good or even great. The reality is on the inside is that I was so caught in being PERFECT that I was afraid, too tired, too sensible to have the courage to move towards my dream. Even if it is just to say ‘No’ to a social outing to write on our journal, or ‘No’ to a loved one when they want our attention.

I am sort of in the place again as a Splendidly Imperfect Person - have I forgotten my lessons. It feels like a long way back. It takes deep courage to follow our dreams whatever that may look like because so many people are hooked on bringing others down, to stampede on dreams because they can’t tolerate that we can actually change our lives, take responsibility and reach for what brings us joy, we can bring our dreams into our daily existence.

PS. I love creating lots of imperfect things and I have discovered a place for the imperfect creations photos that I love.... a place in me.

PPS I can't even get the font to change so I give in to it.